Sunday, June 21, 2009

A Ring Bearer is Ring Security

Weddings are always fun, but the wedding we attended yesterday was simply beautiful. The bride is a good friend of our family. We have watched this sweet young lady go to college, graduate, become a teacher, and now marry the man of her dreams. So we were delighted when she asked our 3-year-old to be her ring bearer for the big day. My son was so excited and announced he was going to be a "reindeer" at the wedding. We all had a good laugh and explained the job title was actually called ring bearer, which he confidently replied, "Oh yeah, ring bear." And so, "ring bear" it was.

He was very serious about his duties and looked dashing in his tuxedo. We chose his outfit at the tuxedo store. It was a tuxedo they sell for young boys instead of renting. It was actually fifty dollars less than renting to buy the tuxedo. So we snapped it up and figured we could save it for our youngest or sell it on Craig's List. Our ring bear complimented the groomsman and looked great next to the flower girl.

For the rehearsal, the Bride and her Mom got my son the cutest t-shirt to wear for practice. It was black and said "Ring Security" on the back. He loved it and looked like a real security detail. All he needed was an ear piece to authenticate the outfit. You can find these shirts at craft stores like Michaels.

I was curious about the tradition of the ring bearer or "ring bear" Here is what I found

What is a Ring Bearer:
A ring bearer is usually a young boy between the ages of 3 and 8 who has a special connection to the bride and groom. He may be related to them, or just be a family friend. He walks down the aisle immediately after the flower girl, or last bridesmaid, with the wedding rings tied to a small pillow.

How to Choose a Ring Bearer:
Look for a responsible young man who is important in your life, and will take his role seriously. If you are having trouble choosing between two ring bearers, there's no reason why you can't have two ring bearers. Give them each a ring to carry and send them down the aisle together. Or, if you're having a long train, get two boys to act as pages or trainbearers instead. Avoid choosing someone who is too young – he will be confused and perhaps scared. An older boy may be more suited for a job such as reader. If your only choices are unsuitable or not that close to you, there's is no reason why you have to have a ring bearer – simply give the rings to the best man to hold.

Preparing Your Ring Bearer For His Role, and Calming the Nerves
I recommend buying a book about being a ring bearer- he'll know what his role is, and understand it's importance. Seat his parents on the aisle, near the front so that he can see them when he walks down the aisle and during the ceremony itself. Ask a groomsman to be his "buddy" and make sure he uses the restroom before the ceremony. You may wish to ask his parents to cut down on the sugar intake the morning of the wedding. Avoid the pressure on him by tying only fake rings to the pillow, and wait to give him the pillow until immediately before he goes down the aisle. Also, ask his parents to bring a change of clothes – young girls are usually happy to wear dressy clothes all day, but young boys are often itching to get out of them! Most importantly, remember the younger your ring bearer, the more you have to be prepared to be okay with whatever happens. If you're the perfectionist type, choose an older ringbearer, or go without.