Monday, August 30, 2010

Foot in Mouth Disease

I never wanted to be that person.  Maybe you know these people who blurt comments out without thought or warning.  They might say things like, "Oh a red head, he must have a temper." Or my personal favorite when someone looks at all three of my boys with their red, blonde, and brown hair and asks me without hesitation, "Do they all have the same father?" Nice.

But, now I am sadly among them.  Totally an innocent mistake, but one that made my stomach churn and wishing one could reel in words with an imaginary fishing pole.

I don't even know why I am writing about this grievous blunder, maybe it is somehow therapeutic?

Anyway here it goes..

On our family outing to Target we made a visit to the toy aisle.  There standing in the aisle with us picture the cutest family

you've ever seen with a boy and girl.  The mommy went to another aisle leaving daddy to tend to their two young children.  As the mommy passed by, I admired her maternity dress and thought to myself how much I liked the pattern.

For what happens next, here's hoping she traveled way across the store to automotive.

"Do you guys know what your having?"  I asked.

"Huh?" Dad looks up.

"Oh."  Me somehow realizing this was going down hill fast. "Do you guys have anymore children?" Insert foot here.

"No, what you see is what you get. No, we're done."  Dad said.  I think he also hoped his wife was in automotive. 

I'm now guessing that wasn't a maternity dress.

"Us too, we have three, we're done"  I quickly turn our cart around with a sick feeling in my stomach only to see my husband giving me a knowing look that he had heard every word.  He also recognized the look on my face that said, "Run, run like the wind." 

He had also seen it 12 years ago in a Banana Republic when I heard my former hair dresser Farrah in the next dressing room.  Hair dresser break ups being the worst kind of break ups.

"Uh, let's go" I said.  Exit stage left, very quickly, no stops, not even to look at the cute bedspreads in home goods.

I know how self conscious most mommies get after having a baby.  One person asked me when my baby was due two months after giving birth to our middle bouncing boy.  

So, I am really hoping that beautiful mommy with the pretty dress didn't hear me.  If she did maybe she knows how much I really wished for the the earth to swallow me after my comment.

Now, if you see me in the toy aisle, know I'll be talking about the weather or that latest Big Foot toy

Since my big foot is currently busy elsewhere.   

2 comments:

Michelle said...

Hahaha... what a funny story! Sorry to laugh at your disease, but that made my morning! ;)

Mommy Message said...

I need to stop being so darn chatty. It gets me into trouble. :-)